My Thoughts on Stranger Things 3

On July 4, Netflix finally unveiled the highly anticipated third season of Stranger Things. As expected, my entire weekend was devoted to binge-watching the entire season. Netflix, I must say my tired eyes owe you a great deal.

While engrossed in the series, I couldn't help but jot down my thoughts and observations, almost like a review of sorts. However, it goes without saying that there will be MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD, so proceed with caution.

The Breakdown

Set during the summer of 1985 in Hawkins, Indiana, Stranger Things Season 3 revolves around the new Starcourt Mall, which attracts attention but also causes local businesses to suffer. Joyce Byers contemplates leaving Hawkins for better prospects, while Sheriff Hopper is concerned about the budding relationship between Eleven and Mike and tries to keep them apart. Dustin returns from Science Camp with a possible imaginary girlfriend, Will senses something ominous due to power fluctuations, Nancy and Jonathan face challenges at the Hawkins Post, and Steve works at an ice cream parlor in the mall alongside Robin, a new character.

Oh, and there's a possibility that Billy is a villain.

All caught up? Great. Let's dive in...

• A group of Russian scientists and military personnel attempt and fail to open the gate to the Upside Down in a secret Russian base. It's highly likely they will make another attempt in Hawkins. How did they even know about the Upside Down in the first place?
• Why are the Russians so keen on opening the gate to the Upside Down? Given the time period and the military involvement, it might have something to do with weaponizing it. Demogorgons can be quite useful in warfare (if they can be controlled).
• In a few years, I can see myself enforcing a rule that states the bedroom door must be open at least three inches when my daughter brings her boyfriend home.
• After everything Joyce has experienced in Hawkins, it's understandable that she's suspicious of magnets falling off the fridge. I mean, she used to communicate through Christmas lights, for goodness sake.
• How can we determine if Dustin's girlfriend, Suzie, is real? Just observe how hard everyone tries to make her seem fake. Her existence will undoubtedly be revealed during a critical scene.
• Creating a powerful radio antenna just in time to intercept a secret Russian-coded message feels like an incredibly convenient coincidence.
• What happened to Billy's Upside Down doppelganger? Did it possess him? Did it come to the real world and leave the real Billy in the Upside Down?
• Hopper's terrible memory for potentially heartwarming speeches leads him to scare Mike so he stays away from Eleven.
• The rat imploding into a blob of goo and escaping just after Nancy and Jonathan leave the basement seems like a ridiculously convenient coincidence for the villain.
• No '80s film or series is complete without a montage of girls shopping to the tune of "Material Girl."
• Having a friend with a co-worker who can speak Russian precisely when you need to translate a secret Russian-coded message caught over the radio is another incredibly convenient coincidence.
• Max and Eleven find entertainment in spying on people using Eleven's powers. But then, Eleven witnesses Billy abducting his fellow lifeguard, Heather. I can almost hear Maximus exclaim, "Are you not entertained?!"
• Mrs. Driscoll, how does that fertilizer taste?
• Poor Will. He still clings to the "bros before hoes" mentality.
• Scott Clarke, the high school Science teacher, knows exactly what's causing events but has no idea what's actually happening at the same time.
• There's a Russian base beneath the mall, and I can't even fathom how that's possible. Was the USA's national defense really that lax during that time?
• Hopper and Joyce return to the lab where strange things occurred in the past. Just the two of them, without any backup. What could possibly go wrong?
• Max and Eleven find Billy having dinner at Heather's house with her and her parents. Everything seems fine, but of course, it isn't.
• Billy and Heather take her parents to the Mind Flayer, which does something to them—tentacles and all. It's never fully explained what happens to the victims. Are they possessed? And by whom? The Mind Flayer or the doppelgangers from the Upside Down?
• Nancy and Jonathan get fired by Tom, Heather's father, which surprisingly seems okay after being French-kissed by a monster's tentacle. Well, apart from being extremely sweaty. Apparently, sweat glands go haywire after being possessed by the Mind Flayer.
• The kids attempt to trap Billy, who's now a host for the Mind Flayer, in a sauna room but fail miserably. He escapes after being hurled through a wall by Eleven.
• If a politician smokes a cigar, 99% of the time, they're a bad guy. Can't spell America without Erica. Nice one.
• I half-expected Grigori to reveal a cyborg face while attacking Hopper and Joyce, maybe even saying "Hasta la vista, baby."
• 7-Eleven is just one of the many product placements we see in this series.
• The elevator is the only entrance or exit to the underground facility. What if it broke down or caught fire? What's the plan then?
• There have been so many instances in my life where Eleven's powers would have been incredibly useful at vending machines.
• The possessed people turn into a pile of goo after they are killed and combine to form a spider crab monster. It's messed up!
• Eleven confronts and battles the monster, but it escapes to join the other possessed people and become an even larger monster.
• Steve and Robin's chemistry is the best we've seen in the series so far.
• Nope, Slurpee is not all the same. It's not just sugar and ice. Let's not forget the food coloring, Hopper.
• El locates the Mind Flayer through Billy's memories. In turn, Billy discovers El's location (Hopper's cabin). Then Snape kills Dumbledore. Voldemort kills Snape. And Harry kills Voldemort. (Sorry, wrong series.)
• The possessed people gather at the mill to turn into goo and merge into a larger Mind Flayer monster. But why did the Mind Flayer bother possessing all these people? Why not simply abduct them all and become a giant monster from the start? And are all those people supposed to be dead now?
• Monsters seem to attack with only one or two tentacles at a time. They could easily use multiple tentacles to finish off these kids immediately.
• Infiltrating and escaping a secret Russian military facility seems surprisingly easy, something a couple of kids and two drugged teenagers can accomplish.
• Steve confesses his feelings for Robin, only to discover that she's a lesbian. Cue Rocksteddy's "Leslie."
• Farewell, Alexei. You've provided the information to Hopper, so your time was up. At least you won a Woody Woodpecker stuffed toy before being killed. All I've won at those places were mints and disappointment.
• Is it a good idea to feature your biggest failure, Coke, in product placement?
• Everyone eventually reunites at the mall, only to decide to split up again.
• El's powers conveniently stop working during the most crucial battle of the series, taking a page from Spider-Man 2.
• Suzie is finally revealed, and I take back what I said about Steve and Robin's chemistry. The duet between Dustin and Suzie is absolutely adorable.
• I half-expected Hopper to jump in during the middle of the song and demand that Suzie reveal Planck's Constant immediately.
• The Fourth of July isn't complete without fireworks.
• Billy's character journeyed from cool to evil to sad to redeemed. In my opinion, it was the best performance of the season. Well done, Dacre Montgomery.
• Destroying the gate machine just as the kids ran out of fireworks to throw at the Mind Flayer monster feels like the most convenient coincidence ever.
• An unwritten rule of TV shows: if they don't explicitly show how you died, then you're not dead yet.
• So now Eleven is Joyce's kid. Did they have to go through an adoption process or something?
• Drama, drama. Read the supposed dead dad's letter. Drama, drama. Hugs, kisses, and moving out. Drama.
• Who is "the American"? Hmm...
• Oh, look, a Demogorgon. This can only end well.

Have you seen Stranger Things 3? What are your thoughts on it? Let me know in the comments! :)